The Aries/Libra Dance: Self and Relationships

by Guru Rattana, Ph.D. - Issue #52, October 6, 2002

How do we deal with change, transformation, responsibility, the unknown and the inevitable? We have to learn to deal with opposites that exist simultaneously. We are simultaneously separate and connected. In forthcoming issues of New Millennium Being, I examine how the basic polarities symbolized in the birth chart can be resolved into wholeness. The lesson of each polarity is a touchstone for achieving peace and happiness on planet Earth in the Aquarian Age.

The root of all pain and problems is lack of consciousness. The basic question facing each of us is "Can we wake-up and stay awake despite the challenges to our psyche?" Conscious awareness makes it possible to make wiser decisions about our life and how to live it. The more conscious we become, the easier it is to navigate our life's journey. The more we live in alignment with universal energies, the happier and more peaceful we feel. The more we incorporate universal truths into our daily decision-making, the more we attract satisfying experiences and fulfilling relationships into our lives.

The Interactive Dynamic of Polarities

Issue 50 was an introduction to the next series of issues, which explores the integration and resolution of polarities. I will examine the six opposing houses and signs, and how they complement each other. Each of the six polarity pairs deals with a different dynamic of ME and US. The first six arenas teach us lessons about personal consciousness that we must learn to function in with others in the world. Deeper levels of mastery offer us greater levels of satisfaction in our relationships and worldly endeavors. The first six lessons are basic requirements on our spiritual journey. These lessons must be thoroughly learned to take us to the next level of power in arenas 7-12. The self-empowerment acquired in our own being is the foundation that supports us in the world.

The Wheel of Life

Let's commence our journey around the wheel of life. In this issue we will examine the astrological houses, which we will call arenas of life, one and seven. Arena one is the home of Aries and Mars. Arena seven is the home of Libra and Venus.

The six polarity pairs are:

• 1-7 Individuality and Partnership
• 2-8 Taking care of self and Creating together
• 3-9 Compassionate communication and Spiritual Truth (speaking our truth and honoring and living the Truth)
• 4-10 Security (inner space, home, family, Earth) and Destiny path
• 5-11 Creativity and Community
• 6-12 Service and Oneness

One/Seven Polarity - Identity and Relationship

Our first spiritual lesson is to become aware that we exist as a separate energy identity. Our identity exists independent of our body, our thoughts, our emotions and our relationships. We perceive that we are pure consciousness. We recognize that I AM. We know that even if we are not in our body, I AM still exists. We are able to be alone in our own consciousness.

Being able to sustain conscious awareness of a separate self, is a baseline for attracting partnerships that honor who we are, and a requirement for maintaining these relationships. We have to be able hold on to our independent identity in order to separate ourselves from others. The urge to merge is very powerful, especially in woman and in water signs (Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces.) If we cannot maintain our own individuality, we get lost in our interactions. Our soul's urge to individuate will create separation (abandonment), in order for us to be on our own and try again to connect with ourselves.

First Arena: Aries

• Basic Problem: We don't know who we are. No sense of individual identity.
• Disempowerment: Externally, socially and tribally defined identity. Family, status and what we do defines us.
• Dysfunction: Aggressive, dogmatic, want everyone to agree with us.
• Conscious Awakening: Aware of self as a separate entity.
• Affirmation: I exist. I am. I am free to be me.
• Empowerment: Individual identity. No longer externally or tribally defined. Cannot be controlled by socially imposed definitions of who we are or rules about what we should do.
• Touchstone: I recognize myself.

Identity Lesson: Being is our Operating System

Doing was our operating system in the Piscean Age. Our doing must now be complemented by awareness of our expanded identity or spiritual beingness. Who we are now determines the success or failure of our actions. We must resonate with our deep soul essence. No superficial identification will pass. We need to be able to stand alone in our own identity, and hold on to who we are and our own truth. We stay connected to our being by remaining consciously present to the sensations in our body. We monitor how we feel doing what we do. Our goal is to act and respond peacefully, in alignment with our own energy.

Relationship Lesson: Partnership Activates and Creates Love

The reality is that we are each an individual and we are all in relationship. Neither our unique expression nor our relationship with each other can be put on hold or ignored. We are all connected. We are all created from the same God or universal life force. We are not separated into boxes and we really don't do anything alone. In the Aquarian Age we are not expected to act alone. We are supposed to realize that we are here to help each other. Doing everything by ourselves is not possible and it isn't much fun. The Taurus/Scorpio polarity will show us how the active integration of male-female polarities between male and female bodies embellishes the cosmic dance.

Resolution of Polarity

The ability to maintain one's separate identity makes it possible to be in relationship without losing oneself and getting lost in the merger.

Goal of Identity/Relationship Polarity: Connection

The goal of the 1-7 polarity is pure soul connection. The ability to recognize our own existence and purity makes it possible to recognize the existence and soul essence of others. Our interaction with others leads us to realize our need to connect and share love. We recognize our desire to cooperate and relate harmoniously. We discover the dynamics of attraction, the interdynamics of courtship(1) and the power of love.

Meet Me in the Heart

If you imagine the astrological wheel with the 12 houses, the lines (cusps) that delineate the houses all converge in the center. And what is this center point? The center point is the heart! Each polarity meets its opposite in the heart, and all 12 join as one in the heart. To stay in the heart, we must resolve or integrate all six polarity pairs. The result is that we enter into another dimension of reality where the energies dance with, not oppose each other. Our goal on planet Earth is to enter and relax in the field of consciousness of the heart.

Ultimately, we enter the dimension of the heart by divine grace. However, the consciousness of universal love is a gift that is both bestowed and earned. Some seem to have earned greater access in previous lifetimes, and are born with greater degrees of openness. Others of us seem to have to work harder to break through the barriers that prevent us from entering the dimension of love. We will examine various routes, using astrological signs and houses as archetypes. Our goal is to facilitate our human journey to our destination of divine love.

Heart Defined

To move into heart consciousness, we must release ourselves from the stranglehold of belief systems founded in the mentality of victim-victimizer. The heart is a place of empowerment. Defensiveness, judgment and fear do not exist in the heart. These are mental attitudes derived from the victim-victimizer paradigm. The mind in the dimension of the heart is a neutral observer. There is no pain in the heart. Pain is caused by mental attitudes and belief systems, that send victim-victimizer messages to the emotions. Emotions in the heart are used for comfort, kindness and empathy. The heart/mind is fearlessly honest and dispassionate. The heart/emotions are passionate and compassionate.

Summary:

• The MIND without the heart is defensive, fearful and judgmental. The HEART MIND is fearless, honest, detached and a neutral observer.
• EMOTIONS without the heart are in pain, unbalanced and often traumatized (and denied). EMOTIONS CONNECTED TO THE HEART feel balanced, comforting and alive. HEART EMOTIONS are kind and empathetic.
• In the heart, the mind and emotions work together to create and operate from passion and compassion

Identity is the Lesson

The eclipse of the female archetype, matriarchal cultures, and their replacement by patriarchal institutions and masculine-dominated belief systems, has brought us to the edge of destruction. Yet I would like to offer a more sanguine interpretation about the purpose of the last few millennia of our human history. The major collective lesson we are supposed to learn from masculine energy is not how to dominate and exploit others. We are supposed to be learning how to separate ourselves as individuals from tribal consciousness, so that we cannot be dominated or exploited.

The basic goal of masculine (Aries/Mars) energy is to establish our individuality and identify our spiritual identity. The right use of masculine energy is not to negate the feminine, exploit women or destroy the life support system of plane Earth. The right use of masculine energy is to establish a relationship with Spirit and Self, and then to take right action guided by this connection to Truth. A clearly defined sense of Self is the basis of personal empowerment and right action in the world. Identity and personal connection with the Divine are required to break the cycle of exploitation and domination, both in our political-economic systems and in our relationships.

In the past (and even now), most people define themselves in terms of external standards, their jobs and their relationships. This is tribal mentality. Men and women are defined by their role and status in the community. Identity is determined by group function and definition in a relationship, not as a unique personal presence or man and woman. In the tribal paradigm, the institution of marriage joins two halves to make a whole.

As we enter the Aquarian Age, the actualization of individuality opens us up to the possibility of a completely different type of partnership, where two complete beings merge, and in the process create another entity or third force.

Autonomy is the Requirement

When individuals are able and willing to take responsibility for their own lives, the victim-victimizer system breaks down. Self-motivated individuals only need opportunities to succeed in life. Rules to keep them controlled and subservient are inappropriate, resented and resisted. When people enjoy taking responsibility for their own lives and actions, community can be based on contribution, where each is supported by offering his or her unique gift to the collective. The foundation of economic enterprises can be creativity based, not profit oriented for the benefit of a few at the expense of the many. Service to the whole and its individual components (real people) can replace greedy rape of the Earth's resources.

To create a planetary paradigm shift, individuals must value themselves, their precious time on planet Earth, their creativity and their lives. We have to know who we are, to take the stand that we, and everyone else, deservee the best our collective efforts have to offer.

The Universe is in perfect balance because the dance of polarities is perfectly synchronized. Our job down here is to orchestrate the dance in physical reality. To do so, the highest expression of both masculine and feminine energies must be the partners. In terms of masculine expression, personal autonomy is required to choreograph the dance.

Personal autonomy is the first piece. This is why so many people live alone, are single or out of relationships. Many are choosing to be alone to establish their inner connection with themselves and God. The journey inward is a very personal one. It takes a lot of attention, training and practice to listen to and follow our inner guidance, trust our intuition, and be scrupulously honest and in integrity with ourselves. We have to have connection with ourselves to identify who is taking care of whom (arena 2), to know who is taking to whom (arena 3) and to know who is in relationship with whom (arena 7)

The absence of personal autonomy creates both the possibility and the probability of self-betrayal, which is a guaranteed saboteur of relationships, and a sure invitation to exploitative economic and political systems.

Ego, Spirit and Traditional Spiritual Paths

Aries and arena one introduce us to our first human lesson - to become aware of and claim our individual identity. We get in touch with our personal existence through our connection with the fire of Spirit. Spirit awakens in the upper chakras. To appreciate the magnitude of the task at hand, it helps to understand the focus of traditional spiritual paths. Masculine-oriented spiritual paths concentrate on opening the upper chakras. The definition of masculine is limited to spiritual enlightenment, and often excludes earthly action and involvement. In general the lower chakras are denied, ignored (good luck) and condemned as bad. This upper holy, lower unholy attitude, practically translates into denying and condemning the body, feelings, emotions, sexuality, the Earth and women! (Notice how the Catholic Church has had a problem with this mindset.)

The basic problem with this approach to spirituality, is that the practitioners become so blinded by the Light of Spirit that they cannot see their own humanness. They cannot recognize and meet their own physical needs, not to mention being aware of the existence and needs of others. In the extreme, they develop and identify with spiritual ego, which leads them to set themselves apart as special. They feed their spiritual egos by glorifying their awareness of Spirit, and condescendingly assume and try to convince others that they too need to achieve this state of enlightenment.

Connecting to Spirit is essential to finding and living from our true identity, but the path is fraught with challenges. Tastes of power can make one insensitive to others. Absorbed in one's own reality can even lead to cruel and heartless behavior. Unevolved Aries energy can be very insensitive. It can discount, negate and ignore others with cold detachment. At the low end (without connection to Spirit) unevolved Aries energy can be aggressive, defensive, offensive, destructive and mean. At the high end, evolved Aries energy expresses as honesty, integrity, sincerity, calm purity and right action.

The Fool Tarot card personifies the naïveté of Aries energy. The Fool is a young boy, so full of his own exuberance that he is recklessly dancing off a cliff. His next steps will rudely awaken him from the arrogant fantasies in his mind. His idea of infinite possibilities will be tempered by a quick drop into physical reality. His idealistic idea of adventure will be marred by his careless actions. The Fool's mind has started to open up, but his head is not connected to his heart, or to his body and physical reality.

On the other hand, partaking in the joy of Spirit is the first step. The Fool reminds us to never lose our connection, and thoroughly enjoy it at every moment. Adapting his playful attitude toward life will facilitate our life quest for maturity and wisdom.

Our Journey has just Begun

Connection with Spirit is necessary, but by no means sufficient. Taurus and the second arena of life teach us that to be complete and whole we must be present in our body, in touch with our feelings and available to our emotions. We must be in touch with our inner feminine to know what action to take. We must connect with the Earth to take responsibility for our actions.

Using the metaphor of astrology, we understand that a spiritual connection and identity is not enough. The next 5 signs - Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo and Virgo - teach us about other dimensions of our humanness. If we are lost in our own ego, we are only a taker. To be a giver and a receiver, we must operate from our heart, not just our head. The modus operendi of unevolved fire signs, Aries and Leo is "Me, Me, I see only ME". When we really know ourselves, we can know others as well. When we can be compassionate towards ourselves, we can be compassionate toward others. The ultimate goal of identity is not personal, but universal. When we really know who we are, we live in the place where we are all one. We are naturally humble, kind and compassionate.

The second through sixth arenas teach us about (2) sensitivity, (3) communication, (4) kindness, (5) the heart and (6) wholeness. We need to learn all these lessons to be able to relate to ourselves and others compassionately. At the end of our inner journey, we find peace in our wholeness. The completion of our inner journey (at least the first round) prepares us to attract mature relationships. The first six houses teach us ways to be there for ourselves, and love ourselves in and out of relationships. The more we master the lessons of the first six houses, the more whole we are, and the more complete human beings we attract to ourselves. Once we have established our relationship to self-love, we are ready to love another.

Our Primary Relationship

Aries teaches us that our divine connection with Spirit is our first and primary relationship. It is in the consciousness of oneness that we never feel abandoned, needy or lonely. Without divine connection we are always in some form of pain. The elemental cause of pain is falsely perceiving and feeling separated from Spirit. There is no way humans will ever experience pure happiness, peace or love without connection to Spirit. We will always encounter our next level of pain in relationship, until we can hold on to our divine connection in all our human interactions and worldly activities.

Once we experience that "God and me" is all there is, and realize that this on-going experience is delightfully sufficient, the rest of our human experiences are icing on the cake of consciousness. We have to learn to connect with, trust, surrender to and count on the Divine. We have to train ourselves to live in divine consciousness and enjoy it, despite our human trials and tests. It is a very sensitive process that requires devotion and dedication. We have to deal with our internal and external distractions while we cultivate and anchor in a new way of being and doing.

It is a challenging path down here on planet Earth. We have to connect with Spirit, we have to learn how to be human, and we have to be able to do both at the same time. It is in the consciousness of oneness with the Universe that we can join as one with a partner. In the space of oneness, ego conflicts can be resolved. The place of oneness is where we go to get guidance, align with our common truth, share honestly and negotiate so that we both win.

The Aries/Libra Polarity

Empowered by Spirit only, Aries risks living in the illusion of phony completeness and freedom. Libra is the polarity that Aries needs to find his heart and his humanness. There is a fine line between Spirit and ego. Libra offers the antidote of relationship to keep the ego in line. Partners act as mirrors that reflect back their behavior to each other. The living feedback in relationship helps expose the ego and open the heart.

Relationships are both mirrors and catalysts. What we see is who we are. If we do not like what we see, we are motivated to examine, understand and change sabotaging attitudes, limiting beliefs and destructive behaviors, i.e. to transform our lives. External reflections that unmask our projections are powerful antidotes to the ego. In relationship it is often tricky trying to decipher who is who, because the reflections are so strong. (Sometimes we are so much alike - e.g. so much into having our own space and freedom - that we talk ourselves out of the relationship.)

If there is something you do not like about a partner, better take a good look at yourself. If he/she is not emotionally available, maybe you aren't either. If he/she is and you aren't, better get busy. Relationships always teach us lessons. Before you dismiss the other person as a jerk, check carefully to see if he/she would more aptly fit the role of a tough love teacher. Actually jerks and saints and everything in between are our teachers.

In Arena seven, Aries notices there is someone else besides himself. Libra teaches Aries that we need partnership to make things happen, to get things done, to balance masculine and feminine polarities, and to nurture emotional energies. When Aries starts to feel a pull in his heart, he lets Libra expand his reality. Venus lures him into the arena of partnership by telling him he can feel even more satisfied and stretch to the next level of creativity and satisfaction. Aries decides to give it a try, when he is promised that he can enjoy life even more and have more fun. Libra promises Aries that he will be fair, and allow for the perfect balance between freedom and closeness.

Of course, Aries must successfully pass through arenas 1 through 6, to have enough pieces in place within himself to attract functional relationships. For this issue, Mars is flirting with Venus.

Libra and the Neutral Mind

The symbol for Libra is a set of scales in balance, which I find a rather boring, cold symbol to relate to, even worse than the Cancer Crab (my Sun sign.) The planet inspiring Libra is Venus, so why not adopt the symbol of the Lovers, like the Lovers card in the Tarot deck? After all, Libra is about relationships, and is associated with the seventh house of friends and lovers. Perhaps the Scales is appropriate for the first stage of Libra. Libra is a masculine/mental sign. The Scales indicate that we achieve mental stability in the neutral mind. Our equilibrium point is first achieved and then maintained in the neutral mind. The neutral mind serves as the lighthouse for supporting emotional stability as well.

In the neutral mind we tune into the Light in the mind. It is our awareness of the Divine that serves as the anchor for our own sanity. It is the foundation of our inner peace. It is our connection with Light and Love that makes spiritual relationships possible. It is the consciousness that we can bring into relationship that helps us transcend the duality between masculine and feminine, and pulls us out of the unconscious conflicts between men and women.

I would suggest that mature Libra can earn the banner of the Lovers. However, the ride is not an easy one. Libra's lesson this lifetime is to pick the right lover. Often Libra goes through a whole list of relationships before finding a compatible partner. The critical skills needed to choose appropriately are found in the neutral mind. In the neutral mind Libra finds his balance, and is able to discriminate between what works and what does not work for him. However, achieving mental centeredness is only the first step. Libra's biggest challenge is to connect his mind with his heart. Libra must find a way to transcend the cold calculations of the mind, and open himself to the compassionate territory of the heart. His mind must realize that his true home (and partner) is in his heart. (Taurus will teach us that to stay in the heart we must integrate our body and our emotions into our consciousness.)

Aries and Libra Meet in the Heart

Whereas Aries may be so involved with himself that he forgets about other people, awakened, heart-centered Libra is always aware that there is someone else who has also needs and feelings. Libra remembers that an act of kindness is one of the most priceless gifts we can share with another human being. Libra does not try to save someone else with his caring gestures. He is neither a father nor a mother to his partner and friends. He simply remembers to share love. Having successfully navigated the six personal arenas of life, Libra expresses love without demanding attention in return. Having made it to the heart, Libra operates from detached compassion. He no longer gives from guilt, need, duty or externally imposed responsibility. What he gives is pure.

Libra and Aries both know when giving is from the heart, because both feel empowered and free. When giving is from the heart, authentic receiving is possible. Libra has learned from Aries that power comes from within oneself. Libra no longer tries to transfer his feeling of wholeness to Aries. Transfer comes from the mindset of trying to save and caretake another. Libra knows that Aries is the source of his own joy. So Libra simply shares with Aries that he recognizes who Aries really is. Through his kindness, Libra acknowledges the spiritual essence of Aries. In the interchange Aries recognizes his Self. The exchange activates the two hearts, and they rejoice in both their individuality and their oneness.

Alone and Together

The right soul chemistry between two people opens us up to the possibility of popping into and relaxing into heart consciousness. However, we must be able to cultivate and maintain this connection within ourselves. We can't be dependent upon the other to keep the connection. If we do, we will most likely sabotage the relationship. One way or another it will end, so we can have time alone to re-establish our connection with Spirit.

When our divine connection is firmly established, we can be both alone and together simultaneously. Partnership is no longer a threat to our identity. In fact, with optimally paired partners, our divine connection becomes stronger. Our interactions take us closer to, not farther away from, the Divine. Our partners and our interactions are not distractions. They serve to reinforce our primary relationship with God.

Freedom and Closeness

Our goal in relationship is to have both freedom and closeness/intimacy. Identity, divine connection and self-love are requirements for tantric (sacred sexuality) partnerships. The above make human connection possible in the context of personal freedom. When we maintain our own identity, we don't threaten another's freedom. When we feel free inside ourselves, we automatically give others space. Individuality is the basis of freedom. If we are not able to contain our own energy and psyche, i.e. separate ourselves from others, we will be experienced as energetically invasive and needy. We will betray and sacrifice ourselves, which does not feel good to either our partners or to ourselves.

Spiritual identity makes both detachment and connection possible. We don't get trapped and we don't get lost. Honesty is possible because we access our own truth, and speak it without fear of abandonment.

Touchstones for Partnership

I have a basic requirement for the partnership I choose to attract in my life - "It is easier to remember God in his presence". I offer this to all of you who are opening yourselves to spiritual relationships. If your being with your potential partner does not pass this test, listen intently to your soul guidance before you proceed. You can save yourself a lot of grief. I didn't say you will eliminate the challenges and learning pains, but you can start at a higher rung in the ladder.

There are touchstones for the next 5 arenas too. (Stay tuned.) And of course, you can set your own. The important thing is that each touchstone is an indication of how YOU feel and act in the relationship. These are not lists of qualities of the other person. They are about YOUR reactions and participation in the dance.

There is more energy with two people, but there are also more challenges and distractions. That is why our primary relationship has to be with the Divine, and our relationships need to support or enhance this elemental relationship.

We come in alone to planet Earth and we must be able to peacefully go home alone. We can exist alone, but we don't have to. In fact there is an enticement to partner. Jesus said it, "When two or more are gathered together in my Name there is love". Together we experience an exponential increase in energy. The undeniable dynamic between two people opens the heart center. Making love creates an alchemical reaction where the merging of masculine and feminine polarities opens the heart. Tantra or sacred sexuality merges the energy of two individuals able to maintain their divine connection and elevates their experience into blissful cosmic oneness. The more both partners are at one with their emotional body, the juicier the connection and the yummier the experience. This is Taurus territory.

Libra and Commitment

As we grow spiritually and experience ourselves as individual beings, we can be both free and conscious in relationship. In light of this fact, the institution of marriage - partnership - needs to be redefined. A traditional Libra marriage can be a cold commitment for convenience. In tribal systems, and under the yoke of victim mentality, commitment can be experienced as slavery to both men and women. Women usually sacrifice their identity, and men maintain theirs by being emotionally unavailable and physically absent. Codependence is scary for both the ego and the pocketbook, and promotes intimacy avoidance.

When our commitment is to another at the expense of our divine connection, we succumb to the traps of superficiality, in futile attempts to prove our love, maintain a façade of connection or to nurture our wounds. When both the man and the woman perceive their position in relationships as giving too much, then perhaps they are giving with misguided intentions to accomplish the wrong goals.

Identity is required to establish boundaries, and to not get lost or overwhelmed. Without commitment to self, partners find ways to separate, so they can re-establish connection with themselves and Spirit. When both individuals are anchored in higher self-consciousness, commitment in partnership can be upgraded to willingness to relax in each other's presence, in order to share love and light. Our relationships can be embellished, by the goals of enjoying the experience of our soul identities and nurturing our spiritual connection.

Commitment and freedom can go hand in hand in the following manner:

1. Commitment to share divine connection creates emotional security.
2. emotional security creates the space for relaxation and trust.
3. Relaxation and trust creates an atmosphere of safety.
4. Safety makes detachment possible.
5. Detachment provides the context for freedom.
6. Freedom makes room for the expression of individual identity.
7. When we can be who we are, there is no need to escape.
8. The dance of freedom and closeness can proceed.

Elevate Your Projection

We all project our thoughts and our intentions to the world and the Universe. Our projections determine what is reflected back to us. Projection is how we magnetize opportunities, relationships and both good and bad luck to ourselves. This is why we are advised to think positive thoughts, and keep our mind from indulging in negativity loops. Basically we are at choice what we want mirrored back to us.

So how can we release our mind from victim-mentality thinking and project out uplifting messages? Any judgment about another person or blaming of someone else or situation is victim mentality thinking. Humm. Yes, we all do this, some more than others. But let's face it, we would be at least happy, and probably enlightened, if we truly only observed and stopped evaluating what is going on in and around us.

Let's take a relationship example. Suppose you have the thought that you are not being treated fairly. Your specific evaluation judges the actions of others. Judging others sends out a negative projection of ourselves. Often what we judge in others is a reflection of something that needs to be healed in ourselves. If we are criticizing someone for ignoring us, maybe we are ignoring our own inner guidance, emotions and inner child.

If we are accusing someone of being inconsiderate, maybe we behave in inconsiderate ways too. Judging someone, instead of understanding why they act in a certain way, is not taking into consideration their situation and feelings (empathy). We can also be assured that there are aspects of our relationship that we did not consider, otherwise the current upset would not have happened.

Any form of I deserve better is true. Of course you do, but this mantra is not going to have the impact on the Universe that you'd want. This thought still projects from a victim mentality. We all deserve the best and we are here to figure out how to get it. The solution is to find a mantra that shifts both our attitude and our altitude. How can we be and enjoy who we are and let the Universe work for us? Instead of being in victim mode and judging another's behavior, we can claim our right to more elevated interactions, by projecting an elevated view of ourselves into the world and Universe.

I Am the Grace of God

We all want loving relationships, whether they be with friends, family or intimate sexual partners. The question is, how to achieve this state of satisfying connection and nurture it. How do we manifest the quality of partnership that we dream of? Yogi Bhajan offers us very wise words. "When you are not you, your relationship is not yours either".(2) He also offered us a self-affirming mantra, that can help us experience our true identity. Conscious of our true identity, we are able to claim and attract what is ours.

We can neutralize our negative projections with the self-affirmation I AM THE GRACE OF GOD. The reality is that this is who we really are. So as we repeat it we become more aligned with this truth about ourselves. Every time you have a negative thought, accept it, but also neutralize it by repeating I AM THE GRACE OF GOD. Many truths will come to us. We may realize that a particular partner is simply not a match. We start to trust ourselves to attract a partner who is an appropriate reflection for our true identity. We also enhance our current relationships with our own internal facelift.

Face it: I AM THE GRACE OF GOD is a much more potent message than "You are a jerk." In the latter case, the Universe registers that we are talking about ourselves, and sends us a similar or worse set of circumstances to deal with. Definitely not what we want!

It only takes a while for us to realize that we ARE the GRACE OF GOD. We start experiencing that this is our essential identity. The mantra creates the experience inside ourselves, and awakens us to our divine essence. This self-affirmation helps us remember our soul. We experience our clear, pure, honest love essence, which we in turn project to the Universe. We will attract different treatment and circumstances, and shift the nature of all our relationships, as we experience and claim our soul identity, which is divine love.

Mars and Venus Meet in the HeartT

Identity and personal Divine Connection go together. I AM and this is what IS. We experience that "God and me, me and God are one".

I AM is the mantra of Aries. THE GRACE OF GOD is the mantra of Venus. Mars is the mentor of Aries and Venus is the mentor of Libra. Venus is the archetype of divine love and the perfect expression of our divine essence. Mars and Venus meet in the heart.

A man wants to see his woman as a goddess. Give him a chance. A woman wants to relate to the divine essence of her man. Give her a chance.

This mantra:

1. activates this truth in our awareness,
2. imprints this reality in our psyche and
3. projects this clear message to the Universe.

Our conscious and subconscious intents shift from hurt, resentment or revenge to connection, compassion and forgiveness. The result is, that our projection shifts from negativity and victimhood to empowered magnetism. Our mind shifts out of victim stories as we release self-destructive patterns, and reverse self-sabotaging downward spirals. We enter another mode, where we vibrate in a way that we can attract what we want and deserve.

I AM THE GRACE OF GOD is a very powerful magnetizer. It has the power to attract our soul counterpart. As you recite it, relax into the truth of the words, and enjoy your true essence. Over time it will shift from a mental exercise to an emotionally comforting practice, that produces very soothing sensations. Express this mantra with emotions - all of them! Let the mantra melt the resistance of any emotional negativity. Let your thoughts come up and allow the mantra to neutralize them. We neutralize the negative mind with a higher expression and vibration of the truth.

As we relate to ourselves differently, we also begin to relate to others differently. We see them not as victimizers, but as soul brothers and sisters, also trying to wake-up and figure out how to get their human need for love met too.

Chanting this mantra will help you establish a firm and inspiring relationship with your divine self. This mantra works because it gets us to focus on ourselves and our true identity. It will prepare you for a spiritual relationship. It will animate and breathe new life into your current relationships. For those who are seeking partnership, you may realize that your soul has been protecting you until such time as you are ready for the right one for you.

Everyone deserves loving relationships if they choose to have them, but we have to claim them by being in an empowered, heart-centered consciousness. This mantra helps us release ourselves from negative self-talk and victim consciousness. It builds self-esteem and self-love. As we deepen and purify our relationship with ourselves, we open the same possibilities with existing and potential partners. This mantra merges the feminine and masculine energies inside ourselves. Let the mantra be your mentor.

Kundalini Yoga - Grace of God Meditation - Directions

As a general practice, every time you have a negative thought, instead of resisting it, or judging it, simply allow it. Then neutralize it by repeating I AM THE GRACE OF GOD. This is the altitude part. We use mantras to rise to the higher expression of who we are.

This is one of the first mantras and meditations Yogi Bhajan taught to women. Although he has not specifically told men to do it, I say try it. I feel it will activate the feminine in men, and help attract your spiritual mate. Try it and see what happens.

I like to do this meditation at the end of my deep relaxation.

Part 1

Lie on your back, fully relaxing your face and body. Inhale deeply hold the breath in while you silently repeat "I am the Grace of God", 10 times. You can tense your fingers one at a time to keep count

Exhale all the air out, holding it out while repeating the mantra 10 times.

Inhale and continue this process, of repeating the mantra 10 times on each inhale and 10 times on each exhale, for a total of 5 inhalations and 5 exhalations This adds up to one hundred silent repetitions.

Part 2

Relax the breath and with the eyes still closed slowly come sitting up into easy pose. Bring your right hand into Gyan mudra (index finger curled under or touching the thumb, other three fingers stretched out straight, palm up, wrist resting on the knee, elbow straight)

The left hand is held up by the left shoulder, palm flat and facing forward. This is called vow position. Your hand is held up as if you are taking an oath. Keep the breath relaxed and normal. Tense only one finger of the left hand at a time, keeping the other fingers straight but relaxed.

Meditate on the governing energy of that finger. Then repeat aloud 5 times, "I am the Grace of God". Continue this sequence for each finger, finishing with the thumb.

Fingers and their Attributes

• Index -Jupiter - wisdom and expansion
• Middle -Saturn - channel emotion to devotion and patience
• Ring - Sun or Venus - physical health grace and beauty
• Little finger -Mercury - power to relate communicate and make decisions
• Thumb - positive ego and Self

End

When both parts of the meditation have been completed, lower the left hand down and place it on the left knee, also in Gyan Mudra. Relax for a few minutes. Sit quietly and let the energy integrate. Be very present to the sensations in your body without evaluation. Just be with yourself, your aliveness and your radiance. Feel the truth of this mantra penetrate to the core of your being, and enliven every cell of your body.

Benefits

Practice twice a day, focusing your concentration on the particular attribute you want to correct or enhance in your life. Initially practice forty days.

The Grace of God meditation will give you self effectiveness, your emotions will become more positively channeled, and your mental health will be improved.

If you practice this meditation daily for one year, your aura will become tipped with gold or silver, and great strength and God's healing powers will flow through you. You will glow in the dark and shine in the light.

Do Yourself a Favor

Serious about creating a more empowered and passionate life for yourself? Want to attract a partner or keep the fires in your current relationship stoked? Go directly to Yoga Technology and give yourself the gifts of:

The Destiny of Women is the Destiny of the World (for both men and women!) and

Sexuality and Spirituality, 2nd Edition (contains enough Kundalini Yoga sets to change your life forever)

References and Footnotes

"Basic Concepts of Astrology", Greg Bogart, The Mountain Astrologer, Issue #104, Aug/Sept. 2002, pp. 51-58.

1. Bogart, p. 53.

2. Yogi Bhajan, Looking into Oneself., p. 50, June 28, 1996 (10/1)

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